Sep 2011

Let The Playoffs Begin!

09/30/11 09:19 AM Filed in: League Info| Joe Morgan Die!| by Pedregoso Rios

Besides beefing up The Pot, -- which is a massive benefit given that no champ will win less than $125 this season -- one of the little-anticipated advantages of offering free trades this season is that lots of teams made lots of trades to beef up their rosters for the playoffs. In the last week of the season alone, SLPL teams made 32 trades -- eight paid and 24 free -- which means that this season’s playoffs should be pretty darned interesting and exciting. Get this: 23 teams have at least eight players in the playoffs; ten of those have at least eight players; two teams have 14 players; one team -- Jim Klinkhamer’s Tres Caballeros -- has a complete 15-player playoff roster. This is doubly cool because many of the teams with beefy playoff rosters are within 100 points of Regular Season Champ Paul Martin’s Cabbage Farmers (who has one of the 14-man playoff rosters).

If you asked me who I think’s going to win, I would have to say I have no clue. The playoffs are always interesting, but this year’s are just too damn unpredictable. Why? I mean, shouldn’t Paul be a favorite with 14 players? Or Jim, who is just 77 points off the lead and a full playoff roster? Not necessarily. One of the things I’ve learned over the years is that having certain players can actually hurt you. For example, if you had Ryan Howard last year, you would have netted -65 points (that is, minus 65 points). Robinson Cano in 2009 would have lost you 87 points. So while it’s great to have certain producers, you may end up paying for it by having too many bleeders. So, I’m at a loss.

Here’s reminder of how points are awarded for each round of the playoffs:

During the Divisional Playoffs...
. Hitters earn 20 points for every home run hit
. Hitters lose 2 points for every K
. Pitchers earn 2 points for every K
. Pitchers lose 10 points for every homer surrendered

During the League Championship Series...
. Hitters earn 50 points for every home run hit
. Hitters lose 5 points for every K
. Pitchers earn 5 points for every K
. Pitchers lose 25 points for every homer surrendered (New in 2011: Was 20 points in previous seasons.)

During the World Series...
. Hitters earn 100 points for every home run hit
. Hitters lose 10 points for every K
. Pitchers earn 10 points for every K
. Pitchers lose 50 points for every homer surrendered

Good luck!

Paul Martin Crowned 2011 Regular Season Champ!

09/29/11 09:58 AM Filed in: League Info| Joe Morgan Die!| by Pedregoso Rios

If Joe Livernois’ Moammar Camacho's were the Boston Red Sox, then Paul Martin’s Cabbage Farmers were the Tampa Bay Rays … and the Cabbage Farmers have been crowned the 2011 Regular Season Champs!

We all know the story by now, so we’re not going to prattle on and on about it. Instead, we're going to let Paul prattle on and on about it. “Joe led in the standings for like two-thirds of the season, and in the end he completely botched it,” Paul said in his press conference last night after winning the title by just nine points. “I’m not going to say it was a monumental collapse. I'd say it's more accurate to say that the Camacho’s collapse was a monumentally monumental collapse. All Joe had to do was make a single trade with a month or so left in the season, and he would be sitting here gloating instead of me. But instead he stayed with A-Rod the entire year. That boneheaded non-move netted the Camacho's exactly 80 points from A-Rod for the entire season. Heck, If he had picked up, say, Dan Uggla on August 3rd, Uggla would have netted the Camacho's 83 points during the last two months of the season alone. So, I’m thankful tonight that Joe went all Moneyball on his fans this season … while he made the season interesting, he is also the reason my Cabbage Farmers are the Regular Season Champs. Well, that and all the great trades I made.”

By winning, Paul earned a cool $505.

Here’s the complete list of champs crowned at the end of last night’s crazy, nutty, cool, awesome, unbelievable games, which marked the official end of the 2011 Regular Season:

Regular Season Champ: Cabbage Farmers (2), Paul Martin
Hitting Champ: Full Circuits (19), Bill Cunning
Pitching Champ: Kirby Puckett's Good Eye (9), Brandon Olivarria
Power-Hitting Pitchers Champ: Kirby Puckett's Good Eye (9), Brandon Olivarria
Arugula Division Champ: Highlanders (17), Rick Coppock
Crisphead Division Champ: Full Circuits (19), Bill Cunning
Endive Division Champ: Cabbage Farmers (2), Paul Martin
Frisee Division Champ: The Blaming Flips (16), Vince Livernois
Radicchio Division Champ: This League Really Blows (11), Dan Klinkhamer
Romaine Division Champ: Washington Bullets (18), Jim Cummings
Spinach Division Champ: ScootTucky Plow (24), Scott Allen
Swiss Chard Division Champ: Detroit Tiger Blood (16), Joe Kelly

Congratulations to Paul Martin and to all our Regular Season champs!

In Other News
After a barrage of last-minute trading -- there were about 25 total transactions submitted at the trading deadline -- trading has now officially ended for the 2011 seasons. And the playoffs are about to begin. Good luck!

Regular Season Nearly Complete; Trading Nearly Over

09/28/11 08:54 AM Filed in: League Info| Joe Morgan Die!| by Pedregoso Rios

Paul Martin’s Cabbage Farmers are six points ahead of Joe Livernois’ Moammar Camacho's heading into the final day of the Regular Season (unless there’s a playoff to determine the Wild Card teams). And with the end of the Regular Season comes the end of trading for the season. From our trade rules:

Trading ends when the Regular Season ends, which is with the final out made of the final game played on the final day of the season (including one-game playoffs to determine Division or Wild Card winners).

For those of you that have earned free trades, it’ll cost you nothing to make those trades, but you have to make ‘em before the final out of the final game of the final game of this season; after that, those free trades are lost to the ether. By my calculations, ten teams have earned a total of 15 free trades that they haven’t yet used. Get ‘em in to me, STAT!

Special Tuesday Morning WTF?! Lead Changes Again

09/27/11 09:11 AM Filed in: Sunday Morning Wiskey Tango Foxtrot| League Info| Joe Morgan Die!| by Pedregoso Rios

Joe Livernois’ Moammar Camacho's are now behind Paul Martin’s Cabbage Farmers by three points. With just two days left in the Regular Season. Here’s how Paul took back the top spot:

Whiskey?! Tango?! Foxtrot?! league leaders, how is this gonna end?

Special Monday Morning WTF?! Six Points…The Other Way

09/26/11 08:37 AM Filed in: Sunday Morning Wiskey Tango Foxtrot| League Info| Joe Morgan Die!| by Pedregoso Rios

Joe Livernois’ Moammar Camacho's have now overtaken Paul Martin’s Cabbage Farmers. With just three days left in the Regular Season. Whiskey?! Tango?! Foxtrot?! league leaders, can you make this more exciting?!

Sunday Morning WTF?! Seven Points...

09/25/11 10:49 AM Filed in: Sunday Morning Wiskey Tango Foxtrot| League Info| Joe Morgan Die!| by Pedregoso Rios

…is all the separates Joe Livernois’ Moammar Camacho's from Paul Martin’s Cabbage Farmers. With just four days left in the Regular Season. Whiskey?! Tango?! Foxtrot?! league leaders, are you really going to take this down to the wire?!

Stretch Run

09/24/11 10:55 AM Filed in: League Info| Joe Morgan Die!| by Pedregoso Rios

Joe Livernois’ Moammar Camacho's are still 13 points behind Paul Martin’s Cabbage Farmers with just four days left in the Regular Season. (Seriously?! The Regular Season ends on a Wednesday?! When the hell did they decide that?!) Unless something big happens in these final days, it appears one of these two will be crowned Regular Season Champ.

Meanwhile, eight teams are less than 100 points off Paul’s pace, which means our playoffs should be pretty interesting. Who’s gonna make a move or two to beef up their playoff rosters? Anyone? Anyone? Bueller? Anyone?

The Minutes Feel Like Seconds

09/23/11 11:14 AM Filed in: GIF Fun| Just Cuz| Joe Morgan Die!| by Pedregoso Rios

It’s Friday, which means we have this to look forward to:

Now Would Be A Good Time To Pay

09/22/11 08:40 AM Filed in: League Info| Joe Morgan Die!| by Pedregoso Rios

With the end of the Regular Season around the corner, now would be a good time to pay already. See how much you owe here. Use this nifty page to pay. ‘Cause, you know, we need to money to pay our winners. Just saying.

Camacho's Finally Blink, Make "Panic Trade"

09/21/11 07:50 AM Filed in: League Info| Joe Morgan Die!| by Pedregoso Rios

Moammar Camacho's owner Joe Livernois has finally made a trade, his first since April. From his e-mail with the subject line “Panic Trade” last night:

Down to the wire, 13 points back, here's a trade (finally):
Troy Mulletwhiskey out. Pablo Sandoval in. Book it.

Joe’s clearly trying to make up some ground on Cabbage Farmers owner Paul Martin, who has lead the Overall Standings for more than a week.

Too little, too late for the Camacho’s? We’ll see.

Oh, Snap!

09/20/11 09:12 AM Filed in: League Info| Joe Morgan Die!| by Pedregoso Rios

I'm Winning owner Ian Hicks is throwing down on This League Really Blows owner Dan Klinkhamer. Ian cashed in on a free trade this morning, trading Matt Kemp for Ryan Bruan, and had this to say to explain why he’s making the trade: “To kill Dan Klinkhamer's (Insert Whiny Name Here) once and for all.” Ian leads Dan by 30 points in the Radicchio Division. Dan has one free trade available to make.

Kevin's Korner: Joe Morgan...

09/19/11 09:00 AM Filed in: Link| Video| Joe Morgan Die!| by Pedregoso Rios

…just die already! Then again, it’s great to see that his career has been reduced to hosting chicken dances after being dumped from ESPN’s Sunday Night Baseball.

Sunday Morning WTF?! Manny's School of Mariachi

09/18/11 08:30 AM Filed in: Sunday Morning Wiskey Tango Foxtrot| Video| Joe Morgan Die!| by Pedregoso Rios

Manny Padilla, owner of Manny’s School of Mariachi and Mariachi Uniform Emporium (at 12 Mal Accidente Road in Santa Lechuga), should really reconsider the commitments he’s made, especially when those commitments include asking his teacher’s assistant Ernesto to herd his students to Santa Lechuga’s public access channel, KBBG, to play this drivel. This train wreck of a performance just makes everybody look bad, but especially the kids, who would look more comfortable if rabid ferrets were in their pants. Speaking of which, the rabid ferrets would sound better if they were playing the instruments. Whiskey?! Tango?! Foxtrot?!, Manny?!? At least give the kids another year of practice before your inflict them on the community!

Slight Overreaction

09/17/11 08:37 AM Filed in: GIF Fun| Just Cuz| Joe Morgan Die!| by Pedregoso Rios

This guy’s got a short fuse, sure, but maybe he could do something to help the poor sea lion that’s about to get eaten by the polar bear in yesterday’s entry.

Uh Oh...

09/16/11 09:20 AM Filed in: GIF Fun| Just Cuz| Joe Morgan Die!| by Pedregoso Rios

I have the feeling this isn’t going to end well. Unless you’re the polar bear.

Moammar Camacho's Playing With Fire

09/15/11 07:56 AM Filed in: League Info| Joe Morgan Die!| by Pedregoso Rios

Still wondering why Moammar Camacho's owner Joe Livernois refuses to make a trade. While he’s led the league for much of the season, there are only two weeks left in the season and he has just given up the top spot in the Overall Standings to Cabbage Farmers owner Paul Martin after leading the past week. When asked earlier this season why he wasn’t trading 15-DL-ers or dumping deadweight from his roster as a way to maintain his lead, Joe said he didn’t want to overreact as long as he was top dog. That strategy has worked for him most of the year, but he’s been in a dogfight with Paul since late August and has been out of 1st place at least eight days over that time. Joe has made one only one trade this season, a $5 trade on April 14th.

Gonna Knock You Off Your Feet

09/14/11 08:57 AM Filed in: GIF Fun| Just Cuz| Joe Morgan Die!| by Pedregoso Rios

Instant karma is a bitch.

Little Mary = Dolphins Defense

09/13/11 08:27 AM Filed in: Video| Just Cuz| Joe Morgan Die!| by Pedregoso Rios

If the season my Pepino Monos are having can aptly be described in a music video as “kinda outta luck,” as discussed yesterday, then the game the Miami Dolphins defense had yesterday against Tom Brady is perfectly described by Little Mary in this home video:

"Kinda Outta Luck" By Lana Del Rey

09/12/11 08:37 AM Filed in: League Info| Video| Just Cuz| Joe Morgan Die!| by Pedregoso Rios

“Flat out of luck” perfectly defines the season my Pepino Mono’s had. Or, should I say, every season my Monos have had?

Sunday Morning WTF?! "Fighting" Irish?!

09/11/11 09:03 AM Filed in: Sunday Morning Wiskey Tango Foxtrot| Link| Joe Morgan Die!| by Pedregoso Rios

Did you even field a defense in the 4th quarter, “Fighting” Irish?! Whiskey?! Tango?! Foxtrot?! Notre Dame?!

Kevin's Korner: We Know Who To Blame

09/10/11 09:25 AM Filed in: Kevin's Korner| Link| by Kevin Klinkhamer

Rube Furrow is a die-hard San Francisco Giants fan. Rube is also the commissioner and payroll manager of the Santa Lechuga Power League. Hmmmmm. If everyone in Santa Lechuga doesn't get paid this year, I think we know who to blame.

The Way It Is Done

09/09/11 10:44 AM Filed in: League Info| Joe Morgan Die!| by Pedregoso Rios

Carrboro T-Birds owner Brian Thornburg has done things the right way this season. By making just $65 worth of paid trades, he earned three free trades, which he then converted into $55 worth of free transactions. That’s one free $15 trades and two free $20 trades. Put another way, Brian was able to make a total of 13 trades, only ten of which he had to pay for. On making today’s $20 free trades, Brian said “Both players are on the 15-day DL and I need some pop to catch up to [Joe Kelly’s] Detroit Tiger Blood in the Swiss Chard Division.” That’s some deft trading … and now, at $20 per trade, was a great time to cash in on those free trades.

Incidentally, Joe Kelly inquired this morning as to whether or not he had any free trades coming in the hopes of retaining his current lead over Brian, which sits at 35 points. This will be a fun division to watch the rest of the season.

We're Back

09/08/11 08:16 AM Filed in: League Info| Joe Morgan Die!| by Pedregoso Rios

It’s been a while, we know, but we’re back for the rest of the season with no planned blackouts. (Please note the whole “planned” thing).

To get the remainder of the season going, see how many current or former SLPL owners you can spot in the following picture, which was taken Saturday night at my mother’s post-service, post-Camacho’s get together. Bonus points for accurately identifying future SLPL owners.

SLPL '11

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